For full version, click here

As a staunch proponent of breastfeeding, I should be happy when the Makassar Province in Indonesia decided to draft a breastfeeding bill, right?  

WRONG! I was ambiguous about it, because from the title of the legislation, it sounds that the bill is aimed towards mothers instead of the public facilities and health workers. The title of the legislation itself sounds vague: "Peraturan Daerah Air Susu Ibu". At a first glance, the title seems to "encourage" (force) mothers to breastfeed their babies... but does it imply that mothers are to be punished for not breastfeeding? It's unclear, but many interprets the law that it puts mothers in a disadvantaged position.

Vague Title, Absent Content

I tried to google about it but couldn't find anything with enough information of the bill. The Kompas article about the bill is unclear: it writes about legislating Early Latch-On and restrict distribution of infant formula. If it's the case, why not make the title of the bill clearer, such as, "Protection of Breastfeeding Rights Bill" or "Regulations of Infant Formula Distribution", since all the debate on this bill revolves around the interpretation and assumptions of the bill content based on the title. Maybe the provincial government is too scared to intimidate the big pharmaceuticals and infant formula company, and hence they put the title without any mention of "infant formula".  If the bill and its deliberation are put in the internet in a transparent manner, people can focus on discussing the content instead of beating around the bush. And the title of the bill should reflect the content clearly.

Say No to Punishing Mothers

If indeed the legislation mandates breastfeeding obligation onto the mothers' shoulder only, and punishing mothers for not breastfeeding, then it is a big shame. There are two main reasons:

1. Such law would not help to increase breastfeeding rate in Indonesia because breastfeeding is not solely based on the mothers decision and ability. It is largely a result of various factors in the environment, starting from the marriage and family level, personal level such as psychological health of both mother and baby and availability of lactation consultant, to a more macro level such as public health education, stigmatization of breast display in public, domestication of women. So far, those others factors have not been addressed. In short, inability to breastfeed is not the mother's fault. It's the environment's fault.

2. Based on the aforementioned diverse factors, conditions of mothers are not uniform, and i think law shouldn't be applied in a situation with a multiple layer of problems. The legislation should work outside-in, addressing macro level issues first with the aim and hope it will reach into the micro level. If there ever need for punishment, it should be aimed at the surrounding factors that affect mothers ability to breastfeed, but not to punish the mothers themselves.

In short, stop criminalizing women and mothers! Instead, support us!

Protect Mothers, Create Conducive Environment for Breastfeeding

I argue that breastfeeding rate will never increase unless the following problems are tackled first, working from macro level:

1.  Public health education on breastfeeding should stop in only giving out empty rhetorics such as "Breast is best" and "benefits of breastfeeding". There should be more emphasis on public education on the "How" factor: How to breastfeed, how to maintain milk supply, how to find support.

2.  Legislation should be there to protect mothers' right, and NOT to punish mother for not breastfeeding. Give incentives to public places to provide breastfeeding facilities. Punish offices who prevents mothers to pump during working hours or not giving facilities for breastfeeding / pumping. Ensure that mothers right to breastfeeding ANYWHERE (including in Metro Mini) is protected and people who forbid mothers to do so should be punished. Protect breastfeeding mothers from the legal recourse of law pornographic law. Protect the rights of mothers who are working: from domestic helper, blue collar workers, to office workers.

3. Increase availability of Lactation Consultants, a new professional health field that is on the rise in developed countries. Imagine, Indonesia with 200 million population only has 10 certified LCs and mostly are located in Jakarta, while Singapore with 4 million people has 40 LCs and even that, Singapore things they don't have enough LCs! Include Lactation science in medical school, give scholarship to doctors and nurses for lactation consultant training, send them to the rural area.

4. Again, mothers should not be blamed for their inability to breastfeed. The blame should fall to the health workers for their conspiracy with infant formula company to give disinformation to new mothers, or to the health department for not providing enough LCs, the blame should fall to the media for publishing advertisement idealising infant formula, the blame should fall to greedy and stingy employer - and there's no law available to defend the mother's rights while working, the blame should fall to the male-oriented public rules that prevents mothers and baby to roam around freely in public space and breastfeed.

Other Blog Posts on This Issue

• Nana
• Masarcon
• Anang
• Rahadian

For the full article, click here

This is just my quick thought on a Pro-Family World, after a discussion with Ari-Thalia and responding to a discussion in ASIforBaby Yahoogroups. As I was quickly jotting down my thoughts on the issue, it was rambling, disorganized, and not well-researched. And perhaps it's also politically incorrect or may be offending to some people, hence I apologize before hand if it is indeed the case. I decide to publish it here so that I won't forget, and hopefully I would be able to write more about this issue.

Begin quoting from ASIforBaby Yahoogroups.

Kalo saya ngeliat masalah FTM (Full Time Mother) vs WM (Working Mother) itu masalah yg lebih gede lagi yaitu masalah norma sosial..

Masalah pertama, pemisahan antara urusan domestik dan urusan publik. Entah kenapa, norma sosial kita cenderung mendomestikasi urusan membesarkan anak (hamil, menyusui, merawat anak). Jadi, urusan2 yang berkaitan dengan itu dibatasi untuk berlangsung di lingkungan dalam rumah aja. Sedangkan urusan pekerjaan, bisnis, mendominasi dunia luar tanpa boleh terjamah oleh urusan membesarkan anak. Thus, wanita yang memilih jalur membesarkan anak sering terjebak norma sosial tersebut.

Padahal, coba dipikir lagi, apa iya anak kecil harus di dalam rumah terus? Waktu dulu, jaman revolusi industri baru mulai, mungkin iya, karena lingkungan kerja memang berbahaya utk anak (polusi, mesin2 berbahaya etc). tapi jaman sekarang, teknologi yang udah maju, dan kebanyakan dari kita di milis ini sebagai white-collar worker environment, yang tidak berbahaya untuk anak. Tetapi mengapa masih ada "stigma" bahwa membesarkan anak adalah urusan tertutup dalam rumah?

Masalah kedua adalah, bahwa kegiatan membesarkan anak tidak membawa keuntungan ekonomi. Wanita yang memilih dari FTM dianggap sebagai "cost" terhadap ekonomi karena dilihat sebagai angkatan kerja yang tidak bekerja (unemployed). Padahal, kalo dipikir, membesarkan anak dengan ASI dan dengan purna waktu bisa jadi membawa keuntungan ekonomi jangka panjang. Sayangnya belum ada riset ilmiah / riset ekonomi mengenai ini.

Jadi, dengan dua masalah ini, wanita dihadapkan dengan pilihan yang lose-lose dalam situasi ini. Jika memilih jadi FTM, ada stigma bahwa FTM tidak bergaul di luar. Jika memilih jadi WM, waktu untuk anak seringkali kurang banyak, apalagi bepergian ke tempat kerja di Jakarta sangat menyita waktu. Tidak ada best-case scenario, bagi si ibu. Semua pilihan membawa efek negatifnya sendiri. Karena itu bisa jadi banyak wanita memilih untuk tidak punya anak.

Lebih jauh lagi untuk kedua orang tua. Jika ibu memilih jadi FTM, bapak harus bekerja duakali lebih keras. Walhasil si bapak memiliki waktu lebih sedikit untuk anak. Interaksi anak dengan ibu dan bapak jadi tidak seimbang. Bahkan ada beberapa bapak yang menganggap pengasuhan anak sebagai penghalang kesibukan. Tapi mau gimana lagi, inilah yang umum terjadi di jaman ini, dan banyak orang harus mengambil pilihan seperti ini.

Karena itu kami (Indrani) di sini berusaha mendobrak stereotipe pengasuhan anak. Caranya sebisa mungkin mengajak anak dengan kegiatan2 yang kita lakukan di luar. Contohnya, saya sebagai FTM mengajak bayi saya (3bln) ke seminar ilmiah, dan orang2 melihat dengan heran karena ternyata anak bisa dibawa ke kegiatan seperti ini. Contoh lain teman saya yang berprofesi sebagai web developer/designer dan ada juga yang sebagai arsitek, sehingga bekerja dari rumah. Mereka mengasuh anak dan mengurus rumah tanpa pembantu atau BS. Mereka membawa anak untuk pertemuan dengan klien, membawa anak ke pameran seni dan pertemuan dengan rekan2 designer. Bahkan mereka membawa anak ke Bar utk dugem di malam hari (karena bar di singapur bebas rokok), sehingga mereka tetap bisa bersosialisasi. Teman saya ini membagi tugas pengasuhan anak antara ibu dan bapak dengan sangat seimbang dan merata. Nah, kata siapa, anak kecil cuma boleh di rumah?

Mari kita coba bayangkan dunia yang berbeda samaa sekali. Boleh dong, berkhayal?

Di dunia yang ini, teknologi komunikasi dan transportasi udah canggih banget sehingga ga ada bedanya berada di rumah atau di kantor. Pilihan untuk jadi FTM atau WM sama2 positif.

Ibu yang memilih untuk menjadi FTM tidak terisolasi, dan dengan network yang canggih ibu2 ini bisa membuat homeschooling dengan ibu2 FTM yang lain, sehingga menekan biaya pendidikan anak. Atau bisa juga membantu mengasuh anak2 dari WM untuk dapet penghasilan tambahan. FTM juga dengan sangat mudah bertukar informasi mengenai pengasuhan anak melalui media blog dan forum website (hehe kalo ini udah terjadi dengan milis ini). Para FTM juga bisa mendapatkan akreditasi dan ijazah mengenai menyusui, pengasuhan dan pendidikan anak dengan assessment kualifikasi mereka oleh organisasi FTM. Selepas anak2 besar, para FTM bisa menyumbangkan ilmu mereka pada organisasi ini untuk ibu2 yang baru melahirkan.

Dunia yang ini, sangat ramah dengan anak kecil dan menyusui. Menyusui dan mengurus anak di tempat umum menjadi hal yang biasa. Baik di taman, di busway, di carrefour, kapan saja dan dimana saja bisa menyusui atau mengganti popok anak. Anak dapat bermain dan berlarian di tempat publik dengan bahaya yang sangat minimum.

Dunia yang ini juga sangat ramah dengan WM. Di dunia ini, tidak ada cuti melahirkan! lho kok malah gak ada? Karena ibu2 ini sejak bayinya berumur sebulan membawa anaknya turut bekerja. Ketika anaknya masih bayi dan banyak tidur, bayi ditaruh di tempat tidur bayi di cubicle dan meja ibu, sehingga kapanpun WM bisa menyusui. Sampai mbak2 teller di bank pun membawa anaknya, sehingga mereka menerima nasabah sambil menggendong bayinya. Guru-guru dan dosen menggendong bayinya sambil mengajar. Konsultan membawa bayinya ke rapat klien, dan klien pun membawa bayinya ke rapat.

Ketika anak sudah bisa jalan, WM bisa menitipkan anaknya di penitipan anak di gedung kantor yang sama, yang dikelola oleh para FTM pro-ASI. Karena jumlah WM dan FTM seimbang, di semua kantor ada TPA. WM mendapatkan bantuan pengasuhan anak oleh pengasuh profesional (FTM), dan FTM mendapat penghasilan tambahan. Setiap empat anak diasuh oleh 1 FTM. Di waktu makan siang, WM menyusui anak di TPA. Saat WM mengantor, FTM memberikan ASI perah. Setiap pulang kantor WM mendapat laporan kegiatan dari FTM.

Ketika anak sudah berusia lebih dari 2 tahun, belum sekolah, dan menyusui hanya sedikit, giliran bapak yang mengurus anak sambil ngantor. Ada banyak pilihan pengasuhan anak balita. Bisa dititipkan di TPA di gedung kantor, dan bapak akan selalu mengajak anaknya makan siang atau minum teh di waktu2 istirahat. Atau bisa juga anak ikut mengantor dengan bapaknya, dan ini bukan hal yang aneh. Karena bapak mengenal anaknya dengan baik, bapak lebih bisa menghandle anaknya dan si anak juga akan berusaha mengerti kebutuhan bapaknya. Walhasil, si anak bisa diajak ke meeting-meeting dan ketemu anak2 kliennya. Hasilnya si anak akan mengerti apa yg dikerjakan orangtuanya selama di kantor, dan si anak merasa tidak terisolasi dengan dunia luar. Kalau anak bosan di kantor bisa turun ke TPA di gedung kantor.

Lebih ekstrim lagi, tempat2 dugem pun menjadi ramah anak2. Bebas rokok, dan tersedia playground / tempat tidur untuk anak. Orangtua yang suka dugem tetap bisa bersosialisasi tanpa harus meninggalkan anak.

Hayo, ibu2 apakah ada khayalan mengenai dunia yang ramah anak? silakan ditambahkan. mudah2an khayalan ini bisa terlaksana.

Start:	Sep 2, '07 3:00p
End:	Sep 2, '07 6:00p
Location:	Singapore

Mark your calendar! Bring your whole family into the screening of Disney's latest "RATATOUILLE" in this family-friendly event held by the Breastfeeding Mothers Support Group in Singapore.







Date : 2 September 07 (Sunday)

Time : 3 pm

Venue : Eng Wah Cinema, Suntec City

Movie : Ratatouille

Ticket : S$12 each (Babies & toddlers under 0.9m who sit on Mommy and Daddy's laps come for free!)



We hope to see you there! Please register by calling the office at 6337 0508 or check out Breastfeeding Mothers Support Group website

For full article, click here

You might have read in Weaned that Noe has made an announcement of his wish to self-wean.  This is when Noe stopped night feeding (he had stopped daytime feeding for quite some time already). At that time, I noticed that my milk production is at its lowest point. I practically couldn't press anything out of my boobies and didn't feel any let-down anymore. It's totally empty!

Well, since a week ago, I noticed a change in Noe's night feeding pattern. He began to latch onto me for a longer period and seemed to enjoy breastfeeding again. Of course it is not fulfilling for him, so he still asks for other milk on top of the night breastfeeding session. I wonder why this change of pattern?

Then I noticed that I started to produce what I think is colostrum during pregnancy. Unlike breastmilk, it's not white and runny. It's very thick transparent slightly yellowish liquid, and tastes rather sweet (yes i tasted a drop of it, out of curiosity). And of course it's full with the colostrum goodness of protein and antibodies etc (no wonder Noe is rarely sick lately).

During BMSG meeting, I shared this experience with Ivy. She advised me that in some cases, toddlers who weaned themselves during the mothers' pregnancy comes back to breastfeeding when the colostrum begins to come in.

Later Peckyin highlighted to me her tandem nursing experience: A few days after the baby little sister's was delivered, her older son eyes were gleaming with joy, knowing that mummy's milk has come back with vengeance! I can't wait to experience this moment, knowing that Noe has the interest in un-weaning himself.

Another funny thing: Uncle Augie Rinaldy bought us a mug in the shape of breast. And Noe was aware of the mug shape and he pretended to breastfeed from the mug!

Noe has made an official statement that he has weaned himself off breastmilk.

You see, Noe would always say, "No more!" when he finishes his drink or food. But today, he suckled onto me for three minutes and said to me, "No more!". It means that I don't have enough milk anymore to satisfy his thirst.

By saying "No more!" I consider it as Noe's official statement that he has weaned himself. I'm glad that it has been a rather successful child-led weaning process. But I'm open to the possibility if he wants to return to tandem nursing once his little brother is born and my milk supply comes back.

For original article, click here

Breastfeeding as Enlightenment



Breastfeeding for me is an enlightenment. Breastfeeding is a "source of thoughts", as quoted in Breastwork (Bartlett 2005 pp. 21-22)

"The bosom" is regarded as the seat of thoughts and feeling. ... Lactating breasts become fertile grounds of wisdom, active organs producing food for the mind as well as the body.

I called it "enlightenment" because I started to think about things that I didn't think about before, both positively and negatively. Positively, I began to be enlightened on the difficult task of mothering, and I learned to appreciate mothers even more. Negatively, I began to be angry at the society and the social constructs that undermines femininity.

This is an on-going writing because there is so many things I want to write about this issue and I have so little time and limited eloquence to jot it down, to properly line it out in a coherent manner.



Naturalness of Breastfeeding and Its Difficulty

I did not know that breastfeeding is not easy and that it is something to be learned.

Many people refuted the naturalness of breastfeeding by saying that, "if it has to be learned, then it is not natural". They also say, "If breastfeeding is indeed natural, why not all people are able to breastfeed, and why babies who are not breastfed alive and well?" Further, Maher (1992) argued that breastfeeding is simply a cultural construct, and extended breastfeeding is just a vehicle in traditional societies to keep women under control.

However, I personally felt that the naturalness of breastfeeding does not lie in the necessity for it to be learned or the ability to survive without it. Every step that human babies are taken to progress is learning process, through analyzing its context and observing others. Even when one has sex for the first time, he or she won't find it very easy. Palmer (1993) even says that primates initiated breastfeeding through communal learning process between the females.

Nevertheless, in Breastwork, Bartlett (2005) tries to detach herself from the naturalness question, because, quoting Klassen, "constructing the natural is a political act". Yet Bartlett tries to simplify the naturalness debate in a more philosophical level:

I remember on  day after I had been breastfeeding for a while when I experienced a moment of epiphany because I finally felt that I felt that I knew what the word "natural" meant, and yet I struggled to define it. It was something to do with me liking breastfeeding, that it had an important place in my life and my relationship with my baby, that it felt "right". The actual word, though, was an empty sign, capable of carrying whatever meaning I wanted to fill it with.

I can totally relate with Bartlett's feelings during breastfeeding. The naturalness of breastfeeding as I felt it, and how mothers and children have survived for thousands of years just with breastmilk, have fostered my perseverance to keep breastfeeding despite many problems that I was having.



Femininity and Contradictions


Breastfeeding in Guanajuato City Square, Mexico

The enlightenment also made me angry. Angry towards societal norm and how my feminine body contradicts the society.

I began to hate the situation where I had to struggle to be discrete in breastfeeding, struggle with my crying baby to look for space for breastfeeding. Why can't I just breastfeed whenever and wherever my baby wanted to? From my anger, I began my silent protest to breastfeed whenever my baby want to and wherever we're comfortable with. From my anger, I started to ask and rethink about the current social norms.

Despite naturalness of breastfeeding, and the scientifically proven benefits of breastfeeding, women are still receiving mixed message.

Breastfeeding is highly encouraged, but current social norms govern that it has to be confined in an enclosed space or as long as it is as "discrete as possible". Basically, the segregation of breastfeeding into private sphere has marginalized women and children from the public sphere. As much as I hate to use slippery slope argument, this segregation has implicated into domestication of women and has formed the current perception that breastfeeding and breastmilk are lewd, perverse, and disgusting (Bartlett 2005). Therefore as women tried to "liberate" themselves, they avoid childbirth and breastfeeding to level themselves up with men, not realizing that the social norms that they're in are the ones that are flawed. Many feminist also see breastfeeding as a vehicle to confine women in private sphere, without seeing further that the private-public dichotomy is created by male-dominated social construct.

Let's began to read Yalom's 1997 work "The History of Breast". One needs to be aware that the gender segregation of private and public space is relatively a new phenomenon, beginning around 2500 years ago, and is mainly western / semitic culture. Compared to millions of years of human history, 2500 years is minute. Further, sensualisation (and hence the taboo) of breast is an even newer phenomenon, and again it is a western/semitic concept. For many societies, the breast is not at all sensual (Yalom 1997). The so-called-primitive culture does not have a clear-cut definition of privacy based on gender, as can be seen in primitive tribes where women bare themselves in the outdoor, breastfeeding their babies while doing their daily work.

Therefore, I just began with myself in breaking down the wall that segregates women, by breastfeeding in public, and I'm doing it for my hungry baby. That's why, when there was a suggestion to create a separate MRT compartment for women and breastfeeding mothers, I totally oppose it because segregation will only strengthen the notion that breastfeeding is really something to be ashamed or embarrased upon, and that it should not be done in public. If other people are disturbed by me breastfeeding, it is their problem. Philosophically this is my stance.



Working Women


Pumping at Work

Further delving into the issue of public space, the contradiction is apparent in the working environment. Recently, since the industrial revolution, the working environment has become a "male/public" space, that is created and regulated by norms derived from the predictability of male's body. There is no room for the unpredictability of women's body such as female period, child bearing, and breastfeeding (Bartlett 2005). I was lucky to be able to work in a place where the boss understands my need by providing time and space for pumping. But majority of working women do not have such luxury. Women had to return to work out of financial necessity or other reason, without adequate support from the working environment to maintain breastfeeding. This is not at all the women's fault, but a larger flaw in the working environment. Hence, the idealisation of breastfeeding does not translate into the reality that many women are now working. This has begun to change for the better, however, I'm skeptical that positive change is happening in third-world countries.



Female Body Awareness


Obsessed with Breast Shape

Through breastfeeding, I started to ask and rethink about my female body. The breastfeeding process taught me to be aware of the natural signs in my baby's body language as well as my own body. It is just amazing to see that my body will "know" when my baby's hungry and will have a leak. I started to believe that women's body is really amazing, and I started to ask, do we really need to buy all these formula milk and baby feeding gadgets, that had just been created recently?

It is sad to see that in the current society, women are not aware of their own body. Women have very low self esteem of their own body, dictated by the male concept of beauty and decorum. Bartlett 2005 and Palmer 1993 highlighted that in many case breastfeeding failures are attributed to male pressure, from husbands who detest wives with saggy breast to the notion that women should prioritize to keep their husband at her household. Eventually, women becomes subjected to corporate domination as consumers, where women are convinced that their self-worth is measured by the things they could afford, even having to go through painful procedures.

• I need to buy new clothes / shoes / bags / , as my old ones are outdated (need vs wants)
• I'm not beautiful, so I will get breast augmentation operation (breast as beauty object is defined by male)
• I have to get birth control pill to regulate my period or avoid pregnancy (in the western world this has become norms for teenage girls rather than medical necessity)
• I want to do caesarian delivery with total anasthetic so that my vagina won't become too wobbly (not because of medical necessity)
• I have to get expensive breastpump in order to breastfeed (women does not yet know about pump-free marmet technique of milk expression)
• I don't have enough milk, so I have to supplement with formula and bottle (relactation is possible except in a special medical case)
• I want my child to be smarter, so I have to keep buying this special formula. My milk is not good enough (special infant formula is not necessary unless medically indicated or when situation forces women to use it as a last resort)

Basically, the message women have been receiving from the social norms and pressure is that women as themselves are never good enough. This is made worse by corporate pressure, plus the male-oriented medical sciences that is detached from the traditionally midwives-based childbirth and breastfeeding knowledge (Palmer 1993).



Women Should not Be Blamed

At the end, Breastwork (Bartlett 2005) avoided to demonize formula feeding because the negativity attributed to formula is often aimed at the women and not the  corporate marketing that shaped the pro-formula social construct. To some extent I agree with her. There is a danger that the war between breastfeeding and formula put women into a dichotomy of good and evil. This should not be the case because one needed to address the contributing factors behind the success or failure of breastfeeding. Those are the availability of information, husband's and family support, communal support, the corporate power of formula companies, and the social norms. A struggle against unethical formula promotion should not put a mother into a judgment that she's a bad mother, because in almost all cases, mothers wants to be the best for their children. In all manner, whether she is breastfeeding or formula feeding, she is a good mother. She, with her noble goal to raise children, may have just lived in the wrong time and in wrong social norms.



References

• Bartlett 2005. Breastwork
• Maher 1992. Anthropology of Breast-feeding
• Palmer 1993. Politics of Breastfeeding
• Yalom 1997. The History of Breast

For full article, click here

The Breastfeeding Mothers Support Group Singapore assigned me to take part in a documentary film program on Breastfeeding. Not that I have a beautiful actress's face, heck, I never even use lipstick in my daily life! I was assigned because I had experienced many problems related to breastfeeding during the first few weeks of Noe's life. So in this documentary I had to share my experience to overcome those problems.

So, last weekend the crews from megamedia (Hazel, Shereen and another lady which I forgot the name) came to my house to do a shooting. It was semi-scripted with interview segments. I had to reenact the situation when I had mastitis. It was real fun!

The day before I cut my hair in an effort to look fresher and sportier. Hope it had worked.

Then the crew came with lots of heavy equipments. The whole production crews are women, because they're gonna shoot bare breast mommies, and some mommies may be too embarrassed to be bare-breasted to male crews. Shereen, the cameralady, is very experienced and really strong. She lug the 10+ kg camera (worth 100K dollars) with her everywhere she goes.

The first scene to be shot is Noe eating breakfast. Knowing his fussiness, I had to make several kinds of breakfast: fried rice with salmon, butter toast, fried sausage, and a plate of koko krunch, all in separate plates, to let Noe chose which plate he wanted to eat. Unfortunately that morning Noe preferred to eat Koko Krunch (an unhealthy breakfast). The whole crew tried to encourage Noe to eat salmon fried rice instead, and they managed to catch a few minutes of footage of him eating the rice.

Anyway, it was really difficult to shoot an active toddler. Noe was easily distracted by the video equipment, and very much interested in the High-Def monitor. So the crew had to aim the monitor toward Noe so that he would stay still. After the breakfast shot, we continued with shooting a scene where Noe played together with us. First, we played football and tennis. Then we continued with drawing cars on the magna-doodle. Then we played with toy cars. Lastly, we all made music together, Noe played castanets and danced to the rhythm of "Elmo's Song".



Then I had to pretend having mastitis. I put on thick sweater and blanket and pretended to be feverish. A thermometer was put into warm water in order to display 40 degree fever. It was a hot day, and I had to wear thick blanket and sweater!

Then Noe took a nap while I did the interview segment. At the later part, Noe woke up and joined the crew to monitor the interview. He understands that he shouldn't make any noise.

At last, in the late afternoon, we did an outdoor shooting. I had to pretend that it was the early stage of breastfeeding. We dressed Noe in a baby outfit, but he refused to breastfeed. at the end we resulted to use Maeischa Fox's doll which looks like a real baby, swaddled it and I pretended to breastfeed the doll. I had to act as if breastfeeding was really painful, but the situation was really funny that I couldn't cry at all. At least my expression showed that I was in pain.

Anyway, it was a fun experience to take part with this documentary.

For full article, click here

When my son latches hungrily onto my bosom and drinks from my body, I always discover a feeling that I have never felt before. It is a blissful feeling, full of love and joy. Time stops. Relaxed. Giving and taking unconditionally to each other. Embrace. Calm. And we look at each other closely and smile. Sometimes he touches my nose and lips too, playfully, curiously.

And when he is finished, he looks drunk and contented. Intoxicated by mother's milk. A big burp will follow. Happy!

He is so lovely! And what a beautiful feeling, breastfeeding is.

And it is a great painkiller for him too. The only thing that can soothe his feeling after a painful fall, is my milk!